Overthinker or Deep Thinker?
Time for a Reframe.
I've been thinking about thinking. Which, given the subject of this blog, feels rather appropriate. More specifically, I've been thinking about the label 'overthinker' and how readily we use it to describe ourselves and others. Usually with a slightly apologetic tone, as though having a busy mind is something we ought to get under control. What if we gave our busy brains a little more credit?
What about the wonderful things that come from thinking deeply? The creativity, the imagination, the curiosity. The ability to explore every angle, spot connections, question assumptions and consider possibilities that others might never have thought of. There's something rather lovely about a mind that likes to wander, investigate and explore. One that isn't always satisfied with the first answer or the most obvious solution.
I should probably confess at this point that I have a rather busy mind myself. I can analyse something from every conceivable angle, then discover a few more angles just for good measure. I've been known to disappear down a rabbit warren of thoughts and, rather than popping my head back out, decide to move in, rearrange the furniture and consider extending into the neighbouring burrow.
It can be exhausting, particularly when I'm spending time and energy exploring things that haven't happened, might never happen or are completely outside my control. Over time, though, I've become much more appreciative of this part of myself. The same mind that can get caught up in endless analysis is also the one that helps me imagine, create, connect ideas and explore possibilities. I wouldn't want to lose that.
In a world that rewards speed, what are we missing?
We live and work in a world that seems to reward quick thinking. Quick decisions, quick responses, quick solutions. There's a certain kudos attached to being able to think on your feet and have an answer ready. What about those who need a little longer? The people who want to explore the details, consider the alternatives and allow an idea to develop before sharing it. Deep thinking takes time. It can be messy, meandering and I suppose rather inconvenient when there's a deadline looming!
I wonder how often we mistake speed for confidence, or a assume a quick response is a better one. Particularly in the workplace, where the first person to speak can easily become the person whose ideas are heard. Sometimes the person who's been thinking about something for three days has spotted something everyone else missed.
Of course, there's a balance to be found. Decisions need to be made, conversations need to move forward and there are, of course times where do just need to flippin' choose what we're having for dinner...BUT there is enormous value in recognising that we all think differently, at different speeds and in different ways.
When thinking gets a bit exhausting
Those wonderfully imaginative minds of ours are inherently rather good at creating stories. We replay conversations, imagine future scenarios, analyse what somebody meant by a particular comment and occasionally convince ourselves of something for which we have absolutely no evidence.
I'm talking about those times when you've finally stopped doing things and your brain decides it's the perfect opportunity to revisit or introduce absolutely everything. Like that awkward moment outside the high school when your dog decided to do an enormous poo in front of approximately a million fourteen-year-olds. Did they notice? Of course they did. Mortifying.
Then there's that time on the train when you realised you'd been talking to yourself. Did the person opposite hear? Do they think you're completely bonkers? Have they told anyone about the strange woman muttering away to herself on the 9.21 to Manchester?
Somehow this leads you to wondering who first thought to combine cheese with tuna in a tuna melt. I mean, aren't fish and cheese supposed to be kept apart? Who broke that rule? Was there outrage? Did they know they were creating something quite magnificent?
Before you know it, you're mentally surveying Greater Manchester for the safest place to hide in the event of a zombie apocalypse. Would the Peak District be better? Too exposed? Perhaps somewhere with a moat. Are there any castles nearby? Would zombies be able to swim? They can't in Minecraft, can they?
And there you have it. In the space of about four minutes, you've gone from a dog poo outside a school to developing a full-scale regional zombie survival strategy.
Quite the journey for a brain that was supposedly winding down for the evening.
It's quite extraordinary where a busy mind can take us when left to its own devices.
Sometimes our thoughts can become repetitive, exhausting or even distressing. We can get caught in loops that leave us feeling stuck or anxious. The very imagination that helps us create beautiful possibilities can also conjure up some pretty convincing disasters.
Maybe the question isn't how do I stop thinking so much? Perhaps it's how do I develop a better relationship with my thoughts? How do I recognise when my thinking is helping me explore, understand and create, and when it's beginning to limit me?
A little kindness for our busy brains
One of the things I've found helpful is learning to recognise when my thinking is opening things up for me and when it's beginning to keep me stuck. The reframe itself has been valuable. Rather than getting frustrated with myself for thinking so much, I can appreciate what my mind is capable of whilst also recognising when it needs a bit of support.
I've also found that small reflective practices can help me get a little perspective on what's going on in there.
With that in mind, I've put together a little exercise called The Thought Audit, inspired by the Buddhist principles of truth, usefulness and kindness. It's a chance to spend a few minutes getting curious about the thoughts occupying your mind, particularly those that seem determined to take up residence at bedtime. You can download it below.
We'll also be exploring this exercise together at my next Rest + Ready workshop on Wednesday 25 November, giving ourselves a little more time and space to reflect, breathe and practice ways to bring rest into everyday life.
Rest + Ready is 90 minutes of standing relaxation, breathwork, guided meditation, readings and journalling. A chance to restore yourself and explore what you might need to feel a little more ready for whatever life has in store. Alas, eventually we have to take the blankets off, put our shoes back on and get on with life. Wouldn't it be lovely to have a few more ways to support ourselves when we do?
I've spent a fair bit of time wishing my brain would give it a rest or even thinking there must be something wrong with my brain. These days, I'm trying to spend a little more time appreciating what it can do, whilst learning when to give it a helping hand.
So here's to the deep thinkers, the busy thinkers, the curious minds and the wonderful imaginations. May we continue to explore, question, create and wonder, whilst also learning when to give those brilliant brains of ours a rest.
Rest + Ready | Wednesday 25 November 2026 | Luna Wholebeing, Cheadle Hulme
A little rebellion against always having to do more.
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